{The Telephone Game}

Growing up I remember playing the game of telephone as we all sat in a circle in school. The statement that started out as “Mrs. Teacher is wearing a blue dress” somehow along the lines ended up being “Mrs. Teacher has a blue dog and he ate her dress”.

Information gets twisted and turned along the way to the end person.
I see this time and time again in my life. “So and so did this” or “Did you hear such and such?”
How easily an opinion is formed when we take information and make assumptions of our own rather than asking the source themselves.
This is so incredibly hurtful at times and also can be so out of this world hilarious when the twisted details ultimately end up coming back to the original party.

It always does, inevitably, someone along the telephone line makes an operator assisted call to the source of it all to ask what the true story is.

Once the truth is revealed it can either reveal how hurtful others who did not take the time to ask can be, as they sit back and talk about the source amongst themselves rather than asking the operator to help them make the clarifying call, or, it can provide a good laugh.
Either way, life is already so incredibly complicated, don’t you think?

Why do we sit back and listen to such nonsense and partake in creating our own story rather than going to the source directly?
Why take so much time and energy out of our daily lives to talk about other people or twist statements and stories making them what we assume they are rather than cutting to the chase and getting the truth?
Is true life really that boring? Are we that interested in proving “how awful” someone is, rather than giving them the benefit of the doubt?
Do we really think that highly of ourselves that we feel it is our right to create our own version of someone else’s intentions or life happenings?

I can be guilty of this to when all of a sudden someone is not texting me back right away; a friend removes themselves from face book. Or, maybe suddenly I find myself being avoided, or at least I think I am but, unless I open my mouth to find out and actually ask I am,

GUILTY~ GUILTY~ GUILTY.

Guilty of assumptions, Guilty of making my own version of someone else’s story, a story that is not mine to tell, but theirs. I would prefer to just ask. What harm will it do? Yes, the truth can hurt at times. But, it can also be very clarifying and freeing.

I recently read a statement that I find to be so profoundly true, it said…….

“Before you speak, ask yourself: Is it kind, is it true, is it necessary, does it improve upon the silence?"

{Walk in their shoes…}

Having our son Michael has taught me so many things I can’t count them all.
One of them is compassion for people with disabilities.
Before he came along I was very ignorant and plain old mean hearted when it came to people who have disabilities.
Laughing at the boy with Down Syndrome who loves his Mickey Mouse gloves and Merlyn hat so much he walks all over town with them on, laughing at the people who walk down the street talking to them selves, and criticizing people for being “slower” than I am.
Using words like retard and gimp {Yuck!}
Looking back at my own behavior is so disappointing. I look at our son and my heart breaks to think I was so cruel before.
Now, I find myself having to hold back my hurtful words when people stare at us when we are out and he is throwing a fit, when people stare at him when we are pushing him around in his chair, when people snicker as he is trying to talk and the words are understood by me but not to them, or when a little old lady says “he’s a little big to be pushed around shouldn’t he be walking?”
Rather than lashing out at those people because they are ignorant, I need to turn the compassion around that I have learned to have for those with disabilities and have the same compassion for those who are ignorant. I need to be an example, an ambassador, and a teacher to those who otherwise don’t know any better. Show them that we are not to be made fun of, or felt sorry for, but rather understood and perhaps a little envied.
See, our family is special, we have our own club. We get to have our own language. We get to experience life in a whole different light than everyone else. We get to realize how special our abilities are. We get to love and trust each other unlike anything else in this life. We get to see the value in EVERYTHING.
So, next time you see someone who has a disability try talking to them, be a friend to them, try understanding them, rather than staring, pointing at them or being impatient with them.
We are part of a special club, a club like no other, you will never have more, joy, laughter, and love, we would love to let you in.